Ahhhhh!
It’s been 2 days and I’m up 4.5 pounds!
Even if it’s part fluctuation, surely SOME of it has to be real, right? That’s an awful big gain. I’ve never gained that much in a month, much less two days!
Oh my, I’m so many emotions I don’t even know:
-excited: can I really do this? Every Christmas I’m tired of being the messed up one. Every new Years I vow to “get buff.” I’m the most extreme ever this year [living like a sick one, not just an athlete trying to gain]…and I’m also the sickest I’ve ever been with my digestion and physical state…but could this be the time things really turn around?
-hopeful but worried: I still want to get better, not just gain weight. Even if I look better and get healthier stats, this is no way to live with all my “issues.”
I’m hanging on to a hope that part of the healing will come with just plain gaining weight, even if that process makes things temporarily worse in terms of digesting.
I have noticed that since I went off my eliminations things have gone progressively and quickly downhill. And I was actually stabilizing pretty well. I’m wondering if I continued the same core eliminations [not too severe, but at least gluten, soy, dairy pretty strict] but also keep my gameplan with the meal plan and activity, if they can all work together so I can heal, gain [and heal more!] and get the life and body I need.
Side note—I’m also OVER my first 2 activity standards = pilates/easy toning alternated with the ½ hour cardio IF I’m still here in two days [I’m making myself weight in TWICE at the standard because my weight has bounced around a lot in the past].
Christmas has resurrected my running dreams. I got a great book with not just training philosophies/plans, but how to adapt it to your body’s response. This is just the kind of thing I need after years of peaks and crashes with chronic injury: this year, instead of heading into the new year with the perfect training plan, I’m heading into it with the tools to build my body and my training to what will make me the best runner I can be and discover a new world of athletics I have yet to experience!
My father passed away.
10 years ago
1 comment:
Hello, and Merry Christmas!
First I wanted to let you know that I did see your original comment - it just found it's way onto an older post rather than the most recent. I'm so happy to hear my words meant something for you. We runners have to stick together in the best and worst of times. We live in the Runner's World and we are all in this together.
I hope that your 4.5 pounds is a legit gain! I've had that happen before where I spike like 5 pounds in 2 days but then I go run and it all goes away. But I think if you keep at it, over a month or even less those pounds can become real mass.
I can tell you truly want to get better. You have a great resolution - and now that you really have hit the bottom, if you can build a strong base, you can slowly work up again to those 100 mile weeks you were smashing this summer.
Best of luck with everything and enjoy your holiday! :)
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